Julian Koster of Neutral Milk Hotel and The Music Tapes has been accused of grooming and sexual assault by Anna “Nesey” Gallons, a fellow member of the Elephant 6 collective who has performed in The Music Tapes, Circulatory System, and as a solo artist. In an Instagram post, Gallons writes:
I began to communicate by telephone and correspond via email with Julian Koster routinely in early Y2K at age 15, each exchange gradually becoming more intimate, though seemingly innocent. He imparted the notion that our connection was like none he had ever known. I was Special. (Eventually claiming I must be his true love or soulmate.) He invited me to visit him in New York, had no qualms letting me have cannabis and stare dreamily into his eyes. Less than a year later, in April 2001, about six weeks before I turned 17, that relationship became sexual. This, by all common definitions, constitutes “grooming.” Many among our community knew. In the summer of 2005 he assaulted me twice. I kept this a secret. I remained his closest friend, keeping his secrets throughout those years, even orchestrating things like the 2008 Elephant Six Holiday Surprise tour and long-awaited albums and tours, things the outside world seemed to regard as restoring “relevance” to E6 (mostly because it compelled Mangum to come back on stage 🙄) But though when I melted down catastrophically in late 08 and early 09 he discarded and ostracized me, I didn’t expose Julian, to my own detriment. Such is grooming. I felt compelled to protect my friends in the E6 community and our fans, holding to that until 2020 when the first utterances of this story escaped my shattered lips in any capacity that named names, and was quickly silenced once I was approached with the possibility of reconciliation, and then erased by his eager PR team (prizing their paychecks over humanity and honor, I suppose.) The more recent history is yet another chapter, but allow me to begin with this initial acknowledgement of my story. This is to be continued. It has been making me deeply ill to sit on this pile of secrets kept for *his sake*. For now let it suffice to confirm that I was groomed, assaulted, psychologically and emotionally manipulated by Julian Koster and I could have reported this fact as early as when our relationship was first consummated in April 2001. Others close to him (actual adults, unlike myself, as I was still 16!) could have also acted on this information then. Why didn’t you, Jeff?
In a reply to the original post, Gallons continues:
Additional info on some other occasion, I’ve got shows to play and, like, need some coffee, haha. But I will say that I have a lot of really loving and supportive folks, like the Harts, in the E6 camp. It was an open secret among many while others didn’t really know or weren’t sure what was happening. When things first transpired there was only one person who explicitly asked what was going on and received a direct and truthful answer back in April 2001, and that was Jeff. Thanks to those of you offering warmth, it is appreciated, but the point of this is to find peace and move on. I’m so done with this nonsense, and ready start living
Gallons also responded to another reply on the post, writing, “My love for Julian has simultaneously been life saving and been killing me, despite some of his actions there is no denying he has a beautiful mind and soul, and creates beautiful inspiring art. The dark parts complicate things but nothing can change the reality that he is truly luminous. No one in the world has ever loved him more than I have and still do.”
In a second post on Instagram the next day, Gallons added:
cw: all the things. I’m predictably receiving a bunch of new followers under kinda lousy circumstances to receive a bunch of new followers, sorry, I wish it were because of something fun! But here are a few basic facts about me: I’m a 40 year old trans woman, married to a trans man. I’m on hrt but don’t really pass and don’t care if I ever do. My partner and I have two kids. I’m an anarchist, omnisexual, and practice ethical non-monogamy very selectively. I share this, among other things, for safety reasons, as the ways our family is Different—without context—are sometimes interpreted in bad faith as immorality and dissolution. Like any Q/ND person, I cannot hope to protect against such willful misunderstanding, so my hope is that sharing what I am sharing will protect against this by connecting with those who either share these differences or can see them as valid, loving, and deserving of the same basic regard for one’s humanity as anyone else.
I am not a “perfect victim” either. I am neurodivergent and suffer from ptsd and bipolar disorder. I have a history of alcoholism. It’s how I coped with keeping these secrets. I also experienced childhood sexual abuse. I have hurt people in my own ways as a result of these traumas and this secrecy, and that is part of what motivates my own healing, to become a safer and better human, to learn and act in ways that reduce harm. I believe in radical forgiveness and while personal accountability is important, we need to focus on the ways the neurodivergent and queer community (particularly older generations) have been deprived of sufficient sex education and crushed by capitalism. Those are our real enemies that cause this kind of suffering among us. I’m typically a relatively private person, but I’m honest and don’t have much of a filter anymore. I’ll engage when I have the mental energy and block folks who can’t communicate respectfully pretty much immediately without a warning. Best wishes to all who mean well
Koster posted a statement in response on his own Instagram earlier today, where he acknowledges that he had a relationship with Gallons, but says it was consensual, and accuses her of “intimidation, manipulation, and abuse.” It reads:
This is painful and scary to share. I have been the victim of intimidation, manipulation, and abuse by Nesey Gallons for many years. Nesey’s recent statements are part of a campaign against me, which is documented in thousands of disturbing, abusive, and obsessive messages, from both Nesey and her spouse Paul Gallons.
Nesey was a superfan of Elephant Six, as was her future spouse Paul, and Nesey moved to Athens, Georgia, to be closer to those bands. Nesey and I entered a consensual relationship in 2001, which continued until 2008. When the relationship began I was 28 and Nesey was 16, just before her 17th birthday. Though this put her over Georgia’s legal age of consent when our relationship began, it was wrong to allow the relationship to happen at all and I’ve apologized to Nesey many times for that. I should have been more responsible about the age gap, but I deny all the other accusations she’s made. This relationship lasted on and off until 2008 when I realized I was trapped in an abusive relationship with her.
Anyone who knows me now or knew me then understands that I always try with all my heart to approach people with empathy and love, including Nesey, and over the last few years I’ve been working hard to build a friendship and to listen to her and acknowledge the pain that she feels. My efforts have been met with increasingly disturbing behavior on the part of both Nesey and Paul, including thousands of threatening and manipulative messages, which are meant to punish me for not agreeing to what they want. In these messages, they’ve demanded that I be in a romantic relationship with them, marry Nesey, move in with them away from my friends and family, finance their living expenses, and let them control me, emotionally, physically, and sexually. They have repeatedly threatened to harm me or themselves if I do not “obey” them.
I have lived in fear for years and I am no longer able to tolerate being abused and controlled. I am seeking an order of protection against both Nesey and Paul. I’m grateful for my friends who know the truth and who continue to love and support me, and I’m now focused on staying safe from my abusers. These years have been so painful for everyone involved and I pray we can all find a way to find peace. — Julian Koster